Saying “Yes, And” to Life
I’m back from break and kicking off season three with some encouragement to embrace ambiguity and accept what life is throwing as us (even amidst the shit show) by saying “yes, and” to what’s on offer. We usually don’t like to look at it this way, but the truth is that we’re all just making […]
My Favorite Books of 2024
While I do love all the year in review recaps that start popping up in early December, I can’t help but feel that means the last 20 or so days of the year become a black hole lost to time. And maybe because my birthday is in late December, I’m especially sensitive to making sure […]
Embracing Everyday Magic with Tarot Reader & Witch Julie Miller
Whether we call it magic, prayer, intention, or simply mindfulness, there is power in how we show up in our lives. It’s often just a matter of how much we’re actually paying attention. In this delightful and seasonally appropriate conversation with tarot reader and witch Julie Miller, we talk about what it means to embrace […]
Adopting a F*ck Around and Find Out Approach to Life with Mindset Coach Ally Rounsley
Swearing is caring, y’all! And in this extra sweary episode, mindset coach and recovering perfectionist Ally Rounsley takes us on a deep dive into how to build resilience by stepping into a f*ck around and find out (FAAFO) mentality. Though, not in the getting-into-fights sense that this phrasing sometimes implies. (And also not in a […]
On Creativity, Identity, Queerness, and Belonging with Filmmaker Jacob Combs
We all pick up a lot of labels over the course of a lifetime – the jobs we have, the ways we show up in the world, the communities to which we belong. Sometimes the labels stick; sometimes we outgrow them. And the beauty and tragedy of adulthood is that it’s really up to each […]
Sharing Our Tenderness and Navigating Vulnerability Hangovers
Sharing vulnerability is the foundation of meaningful relationships and wholehearted living. It’s also really fucking hard – by definition. To be vulnerable means to share our tenderness and open ourselves up to the possibility of getting hurt. But it’s super worth it, and it’s the only way to cultivate the kind of connection that most […]
Habits and Routines and Rituals, Oh My!
Especially in an era that we weren’t evolutionarily designed for, there is way too much shit going on in our lives to get everything done. It’s also super hard to make changes when we’ve gotten ourselves into a rut. Generating momentum around something we want to do for ourselves takes a lot of effort and […]
Recharging Your Batteries
While it’s easy to intellectually know that we need rest in order to get on with the business of adulting, it isn’t always that easy to know what kind of rest we actually need. Pausing to recharge is hard enough on its own, but unless we get clear on what kind of energy we’re trying […]
Guilt-free Pleasures and Chasing Your Dreams with Romance Novelist Alyssa Jarrett
Let’s talk about sex, baby! Or, talk about how reading and writing about sex is a guilt-free, shame-free political act. That’s right, in this conversation with the fabulous debut romance novelist Alyssa Jarrett we go on a wild ride about feminism, authenticity, identity, privilege, pursuing our creativity in the face of nay-sayers, and… werewolf erotica. […]
The Podcast Is Aliiiive!
Holy shit, y’all. I did it. We did it. It’s done did! Settling Is Bullshit is officially a podcast – alive and well, available anywhere you listen to podcasts. And I am so freaking stoked that I woke up at 3:00 am, buzzing with enthusiasm. Not stress, not anxiety, just pure enthusiastic joy that I […]
Doing Things Imperfectly – In Public
What does it mean to have a perfect house? Perfect body? Perfect job? What does perfection feel like? Does it have a color, or a taste? Is it even real? When I stop to think about it, I don’t really know the answer to any of that. In my four decades on earth, I don’t […]
Permission to Be Unoriginal
Warning: nothing you’re about to read here will be original. It will, nevertheless, be worthwhile. (I hope). When it comes to creativity, or starting a business (which is creative, btw), or cooking, or dancing, or dating, or any number of the things we do in the world that invite our inner critic to berate us […]
Dreams Come True a Day at a Time
When I was first getting sober, everyone kept saying how it happens a day at a time. We just don’t drink today, they said. Which, honestly, felt like a stupid, trite catchphrase that was designed to make me crazy. What the fuck did they mean, “a day at a time?” What about next year? What […]
Whatever It Is, Just Pick It Back Up
You know the feeling – suddenly you look up and it’s been weeks or months since you did the thing that you used to do every day. And you feel both panicked and exhausted, and the prospect of getting back to it feels like doing a pull up with arms made of noodles. Or, maybe […]