Action Fuels Motivation (Seriously)

Do you dream about bigger, cooler, more joyful ways of being but just can’t quite seem to make them happen? Or, to maintain momentum once you start? If so, you are not alone, my friend. Not at all.

It’s so fucking hard to stay motived – even around the things we deeply, desperately want for ourselves. But maybe motivation isn’t really the key. Maybe getting shit done has less to do with motivation and more to do with action.

I want to make a somewhat bold declaration that (hopefully) might be helpful to all of us: We can’t wait for the motivation to appear. We have to act our way into feeling motivated.

What’s that, you say? How on earth does that make sense? If I’m not motivated, how can I possibly DO the thing? With some self-compassion and the willingness to take a little bit of action anyway.

Acknowledging the Stuck

Being stuck is pretty fucking normal. It happens for all sorts of reasons – many of which don’t actually matter. What does matter is recognizing the stuckness, becoming aware of the feeling of inertia and acknowledging that something is getting in the way.

Then, instead of trying to figure it out, trying to analyze and unpack and break through the WHY of the stuckness, I’d like to invite you to play with metaphor instead.

What does the stuckness feel like? 

Is it quicksand? Is it a giant wad of gum stuck to the bottom of your shoes? Is it a heavy chain dragging you down/backward? Or (as was the case for me around turning this blog into a podcast), is it more like standing on the edge of a high dive and making the mistake of looking down?

Getting a feel for the flavor or style of the stuckness can really help to move past it. Realizing that it was feeling like being on the high dive helped me see that it was just fear of the unknown, of doing something new. And the only way to get past that was to jump! (I now have two episodes recorded, even though there’s still a ton to do before launch).

I’m a big fan of lateral thinking, of disrupting the narrative and looking at things from a new angle. Inviting in a metaphor for the stuckness can unlock the bullshit saboteur that’s getting in the way. (My saboteurs really like to make things hard on me).

Doing Shit Is Hard

Why is it so fucking hard to do the things we think we want for ourselves? Probably because they’re hard. Changing old habits is hard. Adopting new ones is hard, too. So we tend to let the “but I don’t want to” gremlins win out while we wait for the motivation to appear.

More than a decade ago, I heard a saying that changed my life: “I can’t think myself into right action, I have to act myself into right thinking.” It’s a mantra I return to again and again, especially when I’m depressed or feeling lonely or isolated. Getting up and doing the stupid dishes or folding the laundry really does help shift my mood. And it applies to the things I do want to do as well. 

Now, to be clear, dopamine matters. There’s a lot of neurobiology going on when it comes to our capacity for self-starting and self-regulation. (Speaking as someone with ADHD, I am very aware of this). But, in some ways, that’s why doing it anyway is all the more important. 

To build self-efficacy, we have to take action. The more we prove to ourselves that we are capable of doing things, the more energized and motivated we will feel.

There’s a reason the first mile of a run is called a warm up – it often kinda sucks until our brains and bodies get the chemicals they need to realize running is a good thing.

That’s why it’s important to set aside the “wanting to” or not wanting to and just do a little somethin’ somethin’ in order to get going.

Do Something, Do Anything

Seriously, the way to get motivated is to get up off the couch and do something. It may not be the thing that you think you “should” be doing, but doing something, doing anything is the pathway toward getting shit done. 

Obvious, right? Maybe. But I know I tend to need that reminder – because I often find myself waiting until I want to do the thing, or until I feel ready to do the thing, or until I have the perfect alignment of clean house and inspiration and vast swath of time to do the thing… which generally means I don’t actually do the thing.

Case(s) in point: if I waited until I wanted to do the dishes, it would never happen. If I waited until I felt inspired and fired up about writing, I’d probably get through a handful of posts each year. If I waited until I felt really energized and pumped up about going for a run… well, I never would have made it to my first 5k (I haaaaated running when I started. I didn’t actually start to like it until my first half marathon).

So, I’ve learned to first notice when I’m in that place – the place of nothingness, of procrastination, of stagnation, of melting into the couch and knowing I should do the dishes but good lord I don’t want to. And once I’ve noticed it, once I’ve called myself out on it, all there is to do is get up and do something. 

Sometimes it’s taking out the trash or clearing off some space on the kitchen table. Sometimes it’s just opening the draft of the post I’ve been working on for forever and reading through it (*ahem* – this one). Sometimes it’s checking email for a while before opening the work project I’ve been putting off. 

But doing something is how I build momentum when I’m struggling to do the thing that needs doing – and especially when I’m struggling with the thing I genuinely want to do (in the grand scheme).

Every Little Bit Helps

I think we often get bogged down by the idea that we have to do X amount of whatever the thing is in order for it to count or matter or be worth it. If the task in front of us is too big to feel do-able in whatever amount of time or energy we feel like we have available, then we don’t start.

The trick is to tell ourselves we’ll just do a little bit, and that will be enough. Getting ourselves to do even a bit of the thing we don’t especially want to do will build the momentum we need to get it done. We just have to actually start instead of waiting for the “wanting to” to show up first.

Confronted with a sink full of dishes? What if I just get all the silverware into the dishwasher?

Yard full of leaves that need raking? I can just clear a small section and then stop.

Know I need to strengthen my core but the prospect sounds awful? I can do a couple of crunches each morning.

Or, as is often the case with my writing, I want to get a post up but don’t feel especially inspired. But I can open up one of the seven different drafts I’ve started and abandoned, and I can read what I wrote. And then write just a little bit more (like I’m doing this morning). 

It all counts. Anything counts. Doing something is the only way to get myself to do more of the thing I genuinely want.

So here’s my invitation if you’ve made it to the end of this post: go do something. Do a little bitty thing related to the thing you want for yourself. Then give yourself a bit of credit for doing it! And then maybe do the same thing tomorrow and see what unfolds.