Having a big ol’ snotty cry isn’t a sign that there’s something wrong with us or that we’re somehow broken. It’s actually a radical act of self-love. Meltdowns are just the less fun, less shiny, vastly more unpleasant side of self-love, the side that most of us would prefer to avoid. Turns out, though, that…
Tag: vulnerability
The Life Changing Magic of Nonviolent Communication
It’s happened again. Somebody you care about did a thing – an inconsiderate, unkind, irresponsible, or just plain stupid thing – and it has hurt your feelings. Or made you super mad. Or caused a whole bunch of confusing emotional chaos that you really didn’t want to deal with today. Fuuuuuuck! So. Given that reality,…
Escaping the Mire of Faux Feelings
Invalidated, unappreciated, disrespected, abandoned, unsupported, attacked, judged, invisible… any of these “feelings” tend to crop up for you? Do they come crashing in and wreck your mood, or your day, or your relationships? Invisible is a fan favorite of my inner kiddo, and, ooh boy, that one will fuck up my emotional tranquility real fast. …
What My Recovery Means to Me
Today marks 13 years since I smoked the last of my weed (July 1st, 2010) and decided to try spending 90 days entirely sober (July 2nd, 2010). As it turned out, being completely substance-free suited me really, really well – eventually. When I got sober, I didn’t really think I had a problem with alcohol….
What If Nobody Is Broken?
Here’s a thought to chew on: what if – in spite of all the ways you might struggle with being a human in the world – you aren’t broken? What if the people that hurt us aren’t broken? What if nobody is broken? What would that mean? Who would we be? How would letting go of…
What Do You Actually Need?
Identifying needs is probably one of the hardest things to do. It requires checking in with yourself in a deep and mindful way, which is a process that most of us never really had modeled. Instead, we get told – by society, by our family of origin, by our inner critic – that our needs are “too…
Settling Is Bullshit 